The Joys of Admin

I'm admin on a group on LinkedIn called French Connections – 65,621 members at the time of writing.  The other day I got a join request to review.  The profile was a little bit thin, and only 15 connections, so I sent a message… 

But read for yourself.  

Monday Jack Whittaker sent the following message at 12:47 PM

You are both members of French Connections on LinkedIn

Hi Charlie!   Thanks for applying to join the French Connections group! I have a slight problem - we like members to have some sort of connection to Francophonie (it helps to keep spammers at bay), and unfortunately you don't seem to have one. Probably because you haven't added it to your profile yet, or possibly I just missed it!   Perhaps you live in France? Drive a Peugeot? Love French cuisine?   Please reply and tell me why you would like to join, and if it’s appropriate, add it to your profile. Do please let me know within a few days or I’ll assume you aren’t interested. I look forward to hearing from you   Regards Jack Whittaker Moderator

• Today Charlie O sent the following messages at 3:30 PM 

You are totally wrong in your assumptions.   first of all i am Belgian and Flemish which speaks french and 12 other languages   secondly i lived in nice france for 5 years even got married to my first wife in Nice   But your reaction as a moderator says it alll   Forget about me and be less biased next time. little bonafide Ape.   I know more about france and the culture it stand for then you ever will. You  missed a golden opportunity and cant even write french I bet.   SO, dear wanker: au revoir, Le Petit Pois Un grand salut du LION Flament, which would gobble up little minded Brits or Yankess for breakfast. You must have nothing but 'faux' wannabees trying to understand what I did a long time ago in your group.  I was willing to help you learn about what you claim interest you. Learn to do proper research and get an education  upgrade in social communication on this type of platform you badly need dear FOOL.  Carpe Diem,  I rest my case Dear Moderator you are now challenged and I will make sure the public at large knows how biased you are ....

And you do not dictate what goes on or comes off my profile dear fool!

 <Charlie O sends me a link to his brother’s Linkedin profile for no obvious reason – to spare his brother's blushes, I’ve removed it from this transcript>

my brother would slpa you for saying what you said to me, shall I prosecute you in a court room?

Dumb fool

Moderate that, Mr Le Professuer de math qui est devenue un venduer de petit pois!

• Jack Whittaker sent the following message at 3:34 PM

Jack Whittaker 3:34 PM

Hi Charlie None of that stuff appears in your profile Any one of those things would have got you welcomed to the group without question - but I'm not psychic So - let's assume you are having a bad day - would you still like to join or have I offended you too much?

• Charlie O sent the following messages at 3:35 PM

People like me are protecting what you can find out about me for good reasons as is proven yet again!!!

Lets assume you dont know google exsist A simple charlie o would have answered all your dumb questions

learn to do your job as a moderator you dumb ape

now leave me be and stop wasting my time with your spam pre created paragraphs

No one wil tell me what to put on a profile Unlike you I dont need this linkedin app or site to achiev what I achieved in lifeI was trying to help your group You dumb fool which means I am the good kind of apple you kicked in the balls, bravo fool! ILL GLADLY TAKE SOME TIME NOW TO DOCUMENT THIS ON SOCIAL MEDIA AND MAKE YOUR ATITUDE GO VIRAL

Lets see how you deal with that as a moderator and my internet foot print is huge and I know how to SEO the right way ...

Skills which will garantee your group gets seen as it needs to be seen a bunch of wankers from the UK trying to make french clients or contacts!!!

No smart come backs I see you are a coward as well?

Last but no0t least you should never have been made a moderator ... you haven't got the skills for the role!

lets see where this ape works  and if i have him as client if so your company will be booted off the books

sql dba admin what a joke

Do you even speak french ape?  <enough to know how to spell "vendeur">

Brexit YES voter I bet ....

grow up fool!

• Jack Whittaker sent the following message at 3:49 PM

You seem to be slightly upset Charlie All because I asked a man who lives in Sheffield if he has any connection to francophonie I'm curious - why do you feel that I insulted you?

Sadly, Charlie O never replied

I blocked him from the group, of course – well, obviously

But I took his advice and googled his name.  I found his Facebook account – and it’s chock full of adverts for all sorts of crap.  Remember this line in my initial message to him?  “We like members to have some sort of connection to Francophonie (it helps to keep spammers at bay)”.  Turns out he IS a spammer!